Drink to Lose Weight

This is amusing. An easy way to lose about a pound a month - drink 2 liters of ice cold water per day. This has important ramifications though - if the average 12 oz beer contains around 150 calories, it requires 11 calories just to warm all that fluid up to body temperature. Add the exertion involved in lifting the glass up to the mouth and getting up and going to the fridge. No wonder beer drinkers are so lithe.

How this Blog was Silenced

3 factors:

1. Blogger changed their software and made me login with a Google account. This brought home to me the fact that my blog is hosted by part of the axis of evil and made me sad.

2. Verizon took almost a month after we moved to connect our phone. No internet at home except for the few radio waves I could eke out of my neighbour's connection by standing with one foot on top of a closet.

3. Linux is ugly and deters me from browsing. The fonts are ghastly and the windows hog the desktop.

Glorious News from Mighty Persian Empire

Iran has cured AIDS

'After seven long years of arduous work, Iranian scientists here on Saturday introduced a herbal medicine which cures Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome (AIDS),' Fars reported.

The official announcement is set for February 11, in celebration of the Revolution that caused Iranian scientists and academics to flee the country en mass.

Shoe-Throwers Anon

The NYT illuminates the slow descent of Palestinian society into chaos:

The West Bank intelligence chief, Tawfiq Tarawi, criticized some Fatah officials for trying to play “Red Cross” and mediate between Hamas and Fatah, said a security official who was there but did not want to be named if he identified the officials involved.

I'd be the first to admit that this blog rejoices in spelling mistakes and grammatical faux pases. Still I couldn't help but smile reading that sentance. After scanning it several times I think I got the idea. They are using an anonymous source, but recognizing that we, their readers, suspect them of simply inventing material attributed to anonymous sources, are trying to explain why it was necessary. In this case, I'll take it on faith. It's simply impossible to invent material this bizarre:

During the argument, heated words were exchanged and shoes were thrown, a severe insult in the Arab world.

I'm not sure whether the tossing of shoes is an abomination in American society. I'll hurl a few in the lab tomorrow and will report reactions here. Stay tuned.

Too Much Earnestness

The "bomb scare" hoax in Boston leaves nobody looking good. Initial press reports of circuit boards with batteries strapped on disturbed me. Who would be so stupid as to plant these devices around the city?

But then I saw what they look like. If this is a bomb, then the Riddler has teamed up with Al Qaeda. Granted, we expect the authorities to err on the side of caution, but its absurd that the Boston police considered this a threat. And after inspecting one, wouldn't it be clear that there was no need to raise the alarm? (Unless the Riddler had planted numerous devices, only one of which, hidden in a dark tunnel deep below the city was wired to explode...)

Sadly, a society so terrified that harmless pranks can shut down a city is probably one that will need to do some self-confidence building before continuing the project of building democracy overseas.

Turner Co has behaved disgracefully allowing two Gen X chumps to take the wrap. Somehow corporations enjoy a mystical status that protects the individuals running them. That's illogical. Whoever OKd the campaign should be on the stand, not these two.

Next, the press conference held by the two 'suspects' was a farce. No doubt they were instructed by their lawyer not to discuss the case with the media. So turning the interview into a performance art piece could have been funny and clever. Instead, it was embaressing to watch. They had neither anything provocative to say, nor a direction to take it in. Performance Art doesn't have to be synonymous with extemporized narcisstic fatuousness (although it often is). It requires either careful preparation or an Ali G-like talent for spontanaity.

The Press made me weep. The questions by the Press Corpse suggest that modern journalism has become a division of accounting. What a bunch of humorless bores. Perhaps the media was humiliated that their campaign to scare the public into watching more news was based on a handful of diodes. Perhaps they take themselves a bit too seriously.

I'm perplexed that an Artists Collective would rent itself out to a major media conglomerate to advertise a TV show. Apparently they got $300 a piece for their trouble. Cooperating with a Mass Media company to encourage people to watch cartoons is not subversive, its being-subverted.